"I Almost Married into Earthlink! "  (ThatTotallyRocks.com)

Probably my one (and only) chance to marry into a wealthy family was several years ago when I dated the cousin of the guy who started Earthlink. She went by the name of "Sunshine," her parents were hippies, which accounted for her '60's moniker.

She was quite a wacky gal. She only had one fork in her entire apartment and when I bought her a full set of silverware for her birthday, she was deeply hurt and claimed that I was attacking her "self-esteem." I apologized and offered to return the pricey silverware, but by that time she had discovered the joys of using both a spoon and knife, and decided to keep my "insulting" gift.

She was a fledgingly stand up comic and often tried her routines out on me. This was always dicey because she really couldn't tell a joke. But one night the joke was on me; she confessed to cheating on me with a member of Monty Python, Terry Jones. .Sunshine tried to soften the blow, "I told Terry how funny you are!"

Gee, thanks.